Cracking myself up

Sometimes I am so clever, I crack myself up. So much, in fact, that Dean and I made an acronym about it -- CMU. He knows that if I text that to him, it means I'm feeling very pleased with myself. Sometimes he even asks what about, and I will tell him (spoonerisms! bad puns! song lyrics!). Sometimes he knows better than to ask.

Well, I won't text him right now because he's still in bed, and now that I have this blog, something that's on my mind can just be stored here for a while and maybe he'll read it later. See, this morning, I made up some song lyrics that are making me smile.

A song about CrossFit Marin
to the tune of "My Favorite Things"
(with apologies to Rodgers and Hammerstein)

Jumping on boxes and using the rower,
Doing a push-up and hearing "go lower",
Bear crawl on pavement that scuffs up my skin --
All this I love thanks to CrossFit Marin.

Holding on tighter to rings and to high bars,
Lifting so heavy I'm starting to see stars,
Working my back squats again and again --
All this I love thanks to CrossFit Marin.

Practicing jump-rope and doing more sit-ups,
Going so hard at it, I almost spit up,
Getting the fittest I ever have been --
All this I love thanks to CrossFit Marin.

When I'm down low,
When I feel slow,
When my day's been long...
I simply head back in to CrossFit Marin
I know I will feel so strong!

See, this is MY superpower. I forgot about it in that post about everyday villains and heroes, where I just cast myself as a villain. Give me a tune and a subject and I will give back to you a very clever song in about half an hour. It will come pretty close to the feel of the original song, and be appropriate to the situation. And although I may refer to a thesaurus or rhyming dictionary a few times, it will mostly be spontaneous.

This is something I've done for so long that I can't remember when I started. Making up songs, making up little poems and lyrics, even inventing tunes now and again. As long as the circumstances are somewhat personal, it will end up in some sort of ditty or jingle.

For the kids, the songs were almost always to distract them from screaming or fussing. During tooth brushing, for instance.

We brush-a-brush-a-brush brush,
brush the teeth,
We brush them on the top
and we brush them underneath.
We brush-a-brush-a-brush
your teeth and gums --
We brush them in the night
and when the morning comes!

And diaper changing, particularly when Adrian was a little bound up.

Oh, it's better for your belly
and it's better for your bum
and it's better for your Mommy
so you better give her some.

But it's awful for your Daddy
and it makes him want to cry
Not because he doesn't love you;
You're his favorite little guy...

He just doesn't like poop!

There was more; I'll spare everyone verses two through six.

There have been songs about animals, songs about the babies, songs about riding in the car. And now, a song about the gym. I used to sing so often that it drove baby Adrian to say "Stop singing, Mama" at age 14 months, and little Nathan (an early bloomer) learned to say "Don't sing" before he turned one.

Now, what rhymes with "my husband's up and it's time for a cup of coffee"?

CMU!